First, Christmas morning type excitement:
Next, he fell on his hands and felt the cold for the first time...and decided snow wasn't so great:
And finally, back to his usual explorational self.
Wednesday, December 4, 2013
It's Beginning to Look A Lot Like Christmas!
It only happens every so often in St. George (maybe once a year), but it was especially exciting for me this year because it was Corbin's first experience with SNOW! I took him out first thing this morning (after we got all bundled up of course). Here is the progression of his experience in film:
First, Christmas morning type excitement:
Next discovery: Gloves. But still a little tentative to try it again.
And finally, back to his usual explorational self.
First, Christmas morning type excitement:
And finally, back to his usual explorational self.
Tuesday, November 26, 2013
Two Social Media Shares For Which I'm Thankful
Today I am grateful for the powerful tool that social media can be when used appropriately. In an effort to "escape" after my son's bedtime two nights ago, I browsed Facebook and found a blog post my sister had shared about being fully invested in our children's lives. The blogger ended her post with a long list of the reasons she's grateful to be the mom of her kids. Her message to moms was to believe that kids truly do grow up too fast, and they are not a nuisance to be worked around. You can read her words here.
I have to say, I took her counsel to heart and just played with Corbin all morning the next day. You know what happened? Corbin went down for an early nap, which allowed me to still get my things done before I went to work. Normally I fight him and the things all morning and get him down just in time to leave for work, but still feeling like I haven't accomplished anything. I don't think it will always work out that well, but really, why don't I just enjoy him while I have him? There will be time to do laundry after he goes to bed, or when dad gets home, or
next week sometime. No big deal.
That reminds me of a talk I heard in church on Sunday about tithing. I felt like the woman had written it for me. She talked about the promise that the windows of heaven would be open to pour out blessings onto the tithe payer. Then she proceeded to share some of the blessings which she had received including special finds at thrift stores and on clearance racks or in hand-me-downs at just the right time, the ability to decipher between needs and wants, great kids who are okay with thrift stores and hand-me-downs, etc. I know I've received these kinds of blessings and yet, I've never thought of them that way. What does that have to do with cherishing our kids? I think the principle is the same. When I give the Lord my 10%, he makes sure I have my needs met. When I give my children my first hours, my best hours, somehow I have the time I need to get my other things done.
Then I got invited to view this story about Heather who is an 8 year survivor of mesothelioma cancer. I actually had never even heard of this cancer before, but it is caused by asbestos exposure, and it leaves VERY few survivors. You can watch the story by clicking on the link above. Her video is a beautiful invitation to count your own blessings.
Whenever a story like this is shared, I of course am reminded of how fragile life is and the importance of cherishing each day, but I have to say, what I most took from this video was what Heather shares at the beginning. She says that she and her daughter Lilly are best friends. I really do want to get to that place with each of my children, and I realize that it starts by appreciating having them in my life now.
I have to say, I took her counsel to heart and just played with Corbin all morning the next day. You know what happened? Corbin went down for an early nap, which allowed me to still get my things done before I went to work. Normally I fight him and the things all morning and get him down just in time to leave for work, but still feeling like I haven't accomplished anything. I don't think it will always work out that well, but really, why don't I just enjoy him while I have him? There will be time to do laundry after he goes to bed, or when dad gets home, or
next week sometime. No big deal.
That reminds me of a talk I heard in church on Sunday about tithing. I felt like the woman had written it for me. She talked about the promise that the windows of heaven would be open to pour out blessings onto the tithe payer. Then she proceeded to share some of the blessings which she had received including special finds at thrift stores and on clearance racks or in hand-me-downs at just the right time, the ability to decipher between needs and wants, great kids who are okay with thrift stores and hand-me-downs, etc. I know I've received these kinds of blessings and yet, I've never thought of them that way. What does that have to do with cherishing our kids? I think the principle is the same. When I give the Lord my 10%, he makes sure I have my needs met. When I give my children my first hours, my best hours, somehow I have the time I need to get my other things done.
Then I got invited to view this story about Heather who is an 8 year survivor of mesothelioma cancer. I actually had never even heard of this cancer before, but it is caused by asbestos exposure, and it leaves VERY few survivors. You can watch the story by clicking on the link above. Her video is a beautiful invitation to count your own blessings.
Whenever a story like this is shared, I of course am reminded of how fragile life is and the importance of cherishing each day, but I have to say, what I most took from this video was what Heather shares at the beginning. She says that she and her daughter Lilly are best friends. I really do want to get to that place with each of my children, and I realize that it starts by appreciating having them in my life now.
Wednesday, November 20, 2013
Top 10 Mom Fails
Don't worry...this is not a "Wo is me, I'm a terrible mom" post. It's just that this morning, as I made a last ditch attempt to entertain my toddler by opening up a toy that was supposed to be a Christmas present (today is November 20th and Thanksgiving is more than a week away still), I had to laugh at all the things I do as a mom that I "swore I'd never do."
So here it is. My top ten mom fails--within the first year of being a mom (not in any particular order):
10. Feed child candy. I can't say I swore to never do this, but I definitely have let him have it more often than I thought I would. The reason I'm noticing? I eat it. Dad eats it. So baby of course eats it.
9. Bribe child with candy and other sugary goodness. Justification: How else do you lure him into his carseat without a tantrum?
8. Cry it out. I hung in there for a while, but it suddenly seemed like my going in to comfort or continue my sleep training methods was just setting up a new pattern for habitual waking. He sleeps great now that he has CIO'ed for a couple nights.
7. Wiped his nose with my own finger and then cleaned it off on his pants or mine. I hope this doesn't make me or my child less "popular" among our friends, but really...your own kid's snot isn't gross, well, at least not AS gross as the other kids'.
6. Wiped his face with my licked finger. After wiping his nose with my hand one day, I knew it was only a matter of time before I cleaned his face with my licked finger. It was an act of desperation, I tell you. Family pictures. Dad was in charge of getting Corbin ready because we met on location after I got off work. Cute outfit. Messy face. No baby wipes in the diaper bag. Oh yes, licked finger to the face. He's young. He won't remember it.
5. Aside from candy, feed child junk food in general. The kid loves hot dogs, and although I knew it wasn't the most healthy of choices, I couldn't resist the easy preparation and quick clean up they provided. So yes, he ate lots of hot dogs over the summer. Seriously, they are the one food that he manages to not drop on the floor. Every last bit makes it to his mouth and swallowed.
4. Cloth diapering is not something I've failed at because I never even tried it. I thought I'd get it going once we were in our house and had our own washer and dryer (we shared with our landlords in our old apartment). Once we were in, I said I'd do it once the house felt more pulled together so I could get a routine going. Since I still feel like my house is not pulled together, and I still feel like I'm barely keeping afloat in our "routine" as it is, I now say, maybe with the next baby.
3. Cleaning up after meals. Or should I say NOT cleaning up meals. This started out great. I was so proud of myself. I ran the vacuum after every meal, and Corbin's high chair tray was always cleaned. There was never a sign that a baby had been eating in that chair. That all changed once he could walk. Once I discovered that while I'm cleaning his breakfast mess, he's unloading the pantry, spilling the macaroni and cheese box on the floor, pulling toilet paper off the shelves, and (and I say "and" because he can get ALL this done JUST in that amount of time) dropping his binky in the toilet, I decided that breakfast mess could wait till nap time. As it turns out, at nap time, sometimes I prefer to blog, nap myself, check Facebook, catch up on work, get ready to go to work, or just sit in peace and quiet for a few minutes, so yes, sometimes breakfast is still on the tray and the floor at lunch...or dinner...or yes, the next day at breakfast.
2. Putting clothes away and general housekeeping. After Corbin was born, we refinished a cute little changing table. I was so proud of my handiwork. I got these little green plastic bins from Dollar Tree and labeled each one with clothing items (shirts, pants, onesies, jammies, etc.) I put the clothes in their assigned buckets on the shelves of the changing table. My sister said it was a great idea because it would help me keep things put away since everything had an assigned spot. I thought I had this organization thing down. And it worked great, till the walking thing changed our world. You know where Corbin's clothes are now? If they make it to the buckets, they are quickly pulled out on to the floor. Hence, most are on top of the changing table in piles resembling folded laundry.
1. I will end with the inspiration for this entire post. Yes, we have had a cute little Fisher Price barn toy "hiding" in our closet for several weeks. I bought it just after Corbin's birthday and we decided he had enough toys so we'd save it for Christmas. We knew he didn't care about Christmas, but we did, so we sort of hid it in our room. He still finds it from time to time and plays with the button that lets you try out the noises while inside the box. This morning, I felt like he was bored with everything in the house, and to be honest, so was I. I couldn't get anything done because he wanted me to entertain him. So I pulled out the barn and we had a great time putting it together, discovering all the neat things it does, and, Merry Christmas to me, he played with it by himself for several minutes after I finished. It was short-lived, and I spent the whole time taking pictures of him playing with it...but it was still fun.
Now, to put it back in the box in the closet so we can surprise him with it again at Christmas.
So here it is. My top ten mom fails--within the first year of being a mom (not in any particular order):
10. Feed child candy. I can't say I swore to never do this, but I definitely have let him have it more often than I thought I would. The reason I'm noticing? I eat it. Dad eats it. So baby of course eats it.
9. Bribe child with candy and other sugary goodness. Justification: How else do you lure him into his carseat without a tantrum?
8. Cry it out. I hung in there for a while, but it suddenly seemed like my going in to comfort or continue my sleep training methods was just setting up a new pattern for habitual waking. He sleeps great now that he has CIO'ed for a couple nights.
7. Wiped his nose with my own finger and then cleaned it off on his pants or mine. I hope this doesn't make me or my child less "popular" among our friends, but really...your own kid's snot isn't gross, well, at least not AS gross as the other kids'.
6. Wiped his face with my licked finger. After wiping his nose with my hand one day, I knew it was only a matter of time before I cleaned his face with my licked finger. It was an act of desperation, I tell you. Family pictures. Dad was in charge of getting Corbin ready because we met on location after I got off work. Cute outfit. Messy face. No baby wipes in the diaper bag. Oh yes, licked finger to the face. He's young. He won't remember it.
5. Aside from candy, feed child junk food in general. The kid loves hot dogs, and although I knew it wasn't the most healthy of choices, I couldn't resist the easy preparation and quick clean up they provided. So yes, he ate lots of hot dogs over the summer. Seriously, they are the one food that he manages to not drop on the floor. Every last bit makes it to his mouth and swallowed.
4. Cloth diapering is not something I've failed at because I never even tried it. I thought I'd get it going once we were in our house and had our own washer and dryer (we shared with our landlords in our old apartment). Once we were in, I said I'd do it once the house felt more pulled together so I could get a routine going. Since I still feel like my house is not pulled together, and I still feel like I'm barely keeping afloat in our "routine" as it is, I now say, maybe with the next baby.
3. Cleaning up after meals. Or should I say NOT cleaning up meals. This started out great. I was so proud of myself. I ran the vacuum after every meal, and Corbin's high chair tray was always cleaned. There was never a sign that a baby had been eating in that chair. That all changed once he could walk. Once I discovered that while I'm cleaning his breakfast mess, he's unloading the pantry, spilling the macaroni and cheese box on the floor, pulling toilet paper off the shelves, and (and I say "and" because he can get ALL this done JUST in that amount of time) dropping his binky in the toilet, I decided that breakfast mess could wait till nap time. As it turns out, at nap time, sometimes I prefer to blog, nap myself, check Facebook, catch up on work, get ready to go to work, or just sit in peace and quiet for a few minutes, so yes, sometimes breakfast is still on the tray and the floor at lunch...or dinner...or yes, the next day at breakfast.
2. Putting clothes away and general housekeeping. After Corbin was born, we refinished a cute little changing table. I was so proud of my handiwork. I got these little green plastic bins from Dollar Tree and labeled each one with clothing items (shirts, pants, onesies, jammies, etc.) I put the clothes in their assigned buckets on the shelves of the changing table. My sister said it was a great idea because it would help me keep things put away since everything had an assigned spot. I thought I had this organization thing down. And it worked great, till the walking thing changed our world. You know where Corbin's clothes are now? If they make it to the buckets, they are quickly pulled out on to the floor. Hence, most are on top of the changing table in piles resembling folded laundry.
1. I will end with the inspiration for this entire post. Yes, we have had a cute little Fisher Price barn toy "hiding" in our closet for several weeks. I bought it just after Corbin's birthday and we decided he had enough toys so we'd save it for Christmas. We knew he didn't care about Christmas, but we did, so we sort of hid it in our room. He still finds it from time to time and plays with the button that lets you try out the noises while inside the box. This morning, I felt like he was bored with everything in the house, and to be honest, so was I. I couldn't get anything done because he wanted me to entertain him. So I pulled out the barn and we had a great time putting it together, discovering all the neat things it does, and, Merry Christmas to me, he played with it by himself for several minutes after I finished. It was short-lived, and I spent the whole time taking pictures of him playing with it...but it was still fun.
Now, to put it back in the box in the closet so we can surprise him with it again at Christmas.
Friday, November 15, 2013
Chatty Kathy
I've noticed that Corbin is talking more and more lately. It's still mostly baby babbles, which I love to hear. The one word that I for sure know he knows and will say pretty much on demand is "Weee" as in "weee" I'm on the swings, or "weee" dad is throwing me in the air. I wondered yesterday if he really has had a true first word. He says "dada" and "mama" occasionally but not really in a way that seems like he associates the word with either of us. So I'm thinking "wee" is his first word. Fitting...
In fact, we had family pictures taken yesterday and we could not get a smile out of him almost the whole time. The only smiles were when we were swinging him in the air holding his hands and when he was running around by himself. The photographer called him a thrill seeker, and that's what made me realize that yes, "wee" is his first word.
He LOVES the swings and will say "wee" the whole time he's on them. He definitely liked a lot of motion as a baby, and we always blamed that on the fact that I danced through my whole pregnancy with him. The kid is accustomed to movement and he loves to be on the move.
Anyway, speaking of chatting. Corbin started talking himself to sleep a few months ago (once we sleep trained him), but last night at midnight he woke up and started chatting quite a bit. I was online so I did a quick google search to see if it might be a sign of being under-tired. But I read most people saying that it's normal for babies to want to practice their new skills when they wake up in the night. I'll take it. It's quite fun to listen to chatter over listening to crying.
The problem came when it got quiet, and I THOUGHT he'd fallen back to sleep. I decided to sneak in and turn down the white noise playing in his room. It seemed loud and I wondered if it had woken him up. We just use the static on an empty radio station and so sometimes it randomly picks up some signals and you hear men talking like airplane pilots communicating with the tower. It's pretty funny, except when it's happening and I'm like, "Pilot! Don't you dare wake up my baby!"
Anyway, I snuck in and heard him move. I quickly froze, facing the door, hoping he couldn't see me or smell me or in any way sense I was in his room. Not possible. Although it was pitch black and I couldn't see him, he totally knew I was in there. Stands up and starts to cry so I'll come get him. Game over. So I nursed him and laid him back down and he chatted himself back to sleep. So silly.
And I vowed never to enter the quiet room again. :-)
In fact, we had family pictures taken yesterday and we could not get a smile out of him almost the whole time. The only smiles were when we were swinging him in the air holding his hands and when he was running around by himself. The photographer called him a thrill seeker, and that's what made me realize that yes, "wee" is his first word.
He LOVES the swings and will say "wee" the whole time he's on them. He definitely liked a lot of motion as a baby, and we always blamed that on the fact that I danced through my whole pregnancy with him. The kid is accustomed to movement and he loves to be on the move.
Anyway, speaking of chatting. Corbin started talking himself to sleep a few months ago (once we sleep trained him), but last night at midnight he woke up and started chatting quite a bit. I was online so I did a quick google search to see if it might be a sign of being under-tired. But I read most people saying that it's normal for babies to want to practice their new skills when they wake up in the night. I'll take it. It's quite fun to listen to chatter over listening to crying.
The problem came when it got quiet, and I THOUGHT he'd fallen back to sleep. I decided to sneak in and turn down the white noise playing in his room. It seemed loud and I wondered if it had woken him up. We just use the static on an empty radio station and so sometimes it randomly picks up some signals and you hear men talking like airplane pilots communicating with the tower. It's pretty funny, except when it's happening and I'm like, "Pilot! Don't you dare wake up my baby!"
Anyway, I snuck in and heard him move. I quickly froze, facing the door, hoping he couldn't see me or smell me or in any way sense I was in his room. Not possible. Although it was pitch black and I couldn't see him, he totally knew I was in there. Stands up and starts to cry so I'll come get him. Game over. So I nursed him and laid him back down and he chatted himself back to sleep. So silly.
And I vowed never to enter the quiet room again. :-)
Sunday, November 10, 2013
Random Thoughts about Facebook and Blogging
Started this as a Facebook post, then it got too long, which puts it in the blog post category, as you will see...
After writing two blog posts tonight, I started thinking about the strange things that blogging and social media are. While brushing my teeth, I created these definitions:
Facebook Status: A place for people to broadcast their opinions, unsolicited or not.
Blog: A place for people to expound upon their unsolicited opinions.
Facebook comments: A place for people to counter or agree with the expressed opinion (definitely solicited--after all, you posted it on Facebook).
Facebook Shares: A way of expressing your opinion by posting the link to a blogger who expressed it better than you can.
Two questions:
1. Are we more opinionated now than generations before us, or do we just have more means of expressing our opinions? How did people share their opinions pre-social media?
2. How much of sharing our opinions online actually affects the world around us?
I guess that is three questions. It's getting late. I'm taking my unsolicited opinions to bed now.
After writing two blog posts tonight, I started thinking about the strange things that blogging and social media are. While brushing my teeth, I created these definitions:
Facebook Status: A place for people to broadcast their opinions, unsolicited or not.
Blog: A place for people to expound upon their unsolicited opinions.
Facebook comments: A place for people to counter or agree with the expressed opinion (definitely solicited--after all, you posted it on Facebook).
Facebook Shares: A way of expressing your opinion by posting the link to a blogger who expressed it better than you can.
Two questions:
1. Are we more opinionated now than generations before us, or do we just have more means of expressing our opinions? How did people share their opinions pre-social media?
2. How much of sharing our opinions online actually affects the world around us?
I guess that is three questions. It's getting late. I'm taking my unsolicited opinions to bed now.
Post-Pregnancy Bods: Some Thoughts
Don't worry. This isn't a post complaining about my body, or the weird (and gross) things that happen after having a baby. I remember hearing some of that at a baby shower before I was married and thinking, I will never have children. I will say, it's not as bad as it sounded then. No, this is my thought about how our focus should not be on the body after pregnancy, at least not in the way we generally concern ourselves....so keep reading. :-)
I had a thought yesterday about the focus we place on post-pregnancy bodies. A woman was commenting on some of my dancer friends and how you'd never know that any of them had had kids. Normally, I wouldn't get all up in arms about a comment like that, but it caught me off-guard this time because she was saying it to kids. In all honesty, I think she realized it was a weird thing to say to a group of kids, because she kind of hesitated trying to transition from that comment to the actual point she was trying to make. Nonetheless, it evidenced the fact that as a culture, we focus a lot on a woman's post-pregnancy body. How long it takes for her to get back into her old jeans, pre and post pregnancy weights, etc. etc.
I thought about the message that was already being given to these kids. When a woman is pregnant, she is fat, and if she still looks fat after she has a baby, that is bad. But if she can look like she never had a baby, that is good. So I thought about what message these kids SHOULD be getting from watching moms who have had babies and then still gone back to dancing. This is the message I hope I can share with girls, whether they be my own daughters, or my students, or my nieces...
I wished that instead of celebrating how these women had "gotten their dancer bodies back", we could be celebrating the fact that their bodies are capable of creating life and then returning to full dance activity. That these moms have the support of husbands to allow them to experience both the joys of motherhood and still enjoy the passions that filled their lives before having a baby.
I really do feel blessed to have the opportunities I do to continue dancing and even helping to grow a small dance company here. I know I wouldn't be able to do it without Dustin's support (not to mention the sisters and sister-in-laws that babysit for me). I've tried to reduce my time outside the home so I'm only doing my most favorite things right now--so I can have more time to do my most favorite thing, which is spend time with my family. I never really pictured that becoming my most favorite thing, but babies really change your heart. (Husbands do it, too--but for babies, you are irreplaceable. If you aren't mom, no one else is being mom) And I know I'm a lucky girl to "have it all" even if some of it has to be in very small doses.
I had a thought yesterday about the focus we place on post-pregnancy bodies. A woman was commenting on some of my dancer friends and how you'd never know that any of them had had kids. Normally, I wouldn't get all up in arms about a comment like that, but it caught me off-guard this time because she was saying it to kids. In all honesty, I think she realized it was a weird thing to say to a group of kids, because she kind of hesitated trying to transition from that comment to the actual point she was trying to make. Nonetheless, it evidenced the fact that as a culture, we focus a lot on a woman's post-pregnancy body. How long it takes for her to get back into her old jeans, pre and post pregnancy weights, etc. etc.
I thought about the message that was already being given to these kids. When a woman is pregnant, she is fat, and if she still looks fat after she has a baby, that is bad. But if she can look like she never had a baby, that is good. So I thought about what message these kids SHOULD be getting from watching moms who have had babies and then still gone back to dancing. This is the message I hope I can share with girls, whether they be my own daughters, or my students, or my nieces...
I wished that instead of celebrating how these women had "gotten their dancer bodies back", we could be celebrating the fact that their bodies are capable of creating life and then returning to full dance activity. That these moms have the support of husbands to allow them to experience both the joys of motherhood and still enjoy the passions that filled their lives before having a baby.
I really do feel blessed to have the opportunities I do to continue dancing and even helping to grow a small dance company here. I know I wouldn't be able to do it without Dustin's support (not to mention the sisters and sister-in-laws that babysit for me). I've tried to reduce my time outside the home so I'm only doing my most favorite things right now--so I can have more time to do my most favorite thing, which is spend time with my family. I never really pictured that becoming my most favorite thing, but babies really change your heart. (Husbands do it, too--but for babies, you are irreplaceable. If you aren't mom, no one else is being mom) And I know I'm a lucky girl to "have it all" even if some of it has to be in very small doses.
Yo-ho, yo-ho! The Toddler Life for Me!
Well, we are in full swing with toddler-dom. Corbin now reaches most everything dangerous in our house. I've caught him with kitchen knives twice (Dad has been taught to put them in the sink or far back on the counter). We throw great tantrums getting into the carseat, before most naps, and fairly regularly now for bedtime. We prefer pushing the stroller rather than riding in it (so as to stop and fill the cargo area with all the rocks we find on the ground). And he can destroy the living room (and kitchen, bathroom, and my own bedroom) faster than mom can load the washer.
Ah yes, we are living the toddler life.
There are some fun things, however. I love watching him make new discoveries (the key word there is "watching" as opposed to walking in to the next room to discover the new discovery). Some new discoveries:
• Lifting the toilet seat
• Flushing the toilet (fortunately, we've only made it that far. Aside from a binky which got thrown away after its swim in the white ceramic pool, nothing has been flushed down--as far as I know).
• New words: He can sign "more" and "please" although he isn't always willing to do so. He understands the words "drink"and "eat" for sure, as well as "hug" and "kiss" and we are working on signing "thank you".
• Giving hugs and kisses. Definitely my favorite by far. The first day I realized he understood this, I think I asked for a million hugs.
• "So soft" is something I say when he lays his head on his pillow pet or a blanket or anything soft. So now if I say "so soft" he lays his head on me or whatever I am holding. It's really sweet.
• Rocks. This kid loves rocks. Our neighbors have all rocks (desert landscape) and they are so nice to Corbin. Good thing because I think he steals a handful of rocks each time we walk by. We rarely walk farther than the corner anymore because he could sit and play with their rocks forever.
• Candy. Much to my chagrin he has discovered candy. It seems like kids quickly connect the sound of rustling packaging with delicious sweet treats because Corbin somehow always knows when you are holding candy. And he makes his intense desires known!
Another new development for us has been making new friends. We are so excited to be getting to know neighbors and ward members...finally. It seems like it has taken a long time to get acclimated to our new area, and I was really missing my old ward. But yesterday we met a mom with a boy Corbin's age at a yard sale across from our house. She lives down the street and came over tonight to introduce her husband to us. They are really sweet and I'm glad they live so close.
We also went tonight to visit a couple from our ward who has a baby boy that will turn 1 this month. The wife is from the Philippines so it was fun for Dustin to talk mission areas with her and mission foods, etc. She is a convert to the LDS church and so we will get to teach her new member lessons. I am so excited to be working as a missionary again. I've missed feeling a part of the work (my own fault, right? Many are called but few choose to do the work...)
Corbin loves being with other kids, but tonight I realized that he needs LOTS of wind down time before bed, especially if he's been stimulated by playing with other kids. He had a pretty bad tantrum before bed tonight. I am going to do my best to be home from 4:00 on in the evenings so we can have quiet time before bed. He just seems to do better that way. Sleep is a real battle right now. He's waking up multiple times in the night again, which is really frustrating. But I am praying for patience and I feel like the Lord is blessing me with the help I need.
We also made another discovery today. I call it play-group church. I wish it existed every Sunday, but today was Stake Conference so they had the auxiliary rooms set up for overflow. We checked it out and sure enough, three other young families were in there, toys on the floor, kids wandering the space, Cheerios and books to be shared among all. It was so nice. I heard about half of what was said in the meeting, but it was more than I would have heard wandering the halls with Corbin.
The most interesting thing I noticed, though (interesting for me as Corbin's mom), is that when nap time approached and you could tell that all the kids were needing to go home for naps, where the other kids wanted to be held or cuddled, drink bottles, etc., Corbin seemed to get more and more wild. It was evidence to me of what I read about in my sleep training book. There are different types of personalities which she lists in there, and I had pegged Corbin for a "spirited" boy. People have told me that he seems mellow, so then I questioned it. But in this book, she says that spirited children need more wind-down time before sleeping, and that they are prone to tantrums when they get overtired or over-stimulated. The trick, she says, is to avoid the tantrum by getting them down for naps or bed at the first sign of tiredness. The difficulty for me in that is that I can't tell Corbin is getting tired until he is so wild, I realize he is overtired. He just gets more and more wound up until I'm going nuts, and think, oh wait, he needs to be sleeping. Enter total tantrum...
Oh well, they are only little for a short while in the eternal scheme. I will try to keep remembering that.
Ah yes, we are living the toddler life.
There are some fun things, however. I love watching him make new discoveries (the key word there is "watching" as opposed to walking in to the next room to discover the new discovery). Some new discoveries:
• Lifting the toilet seat
• Flushing the toilet (fortunately, we've only made it that far. Aside from a binky which got thrown away after its swim in the white ceramic pool, nothing has been flushed down--as far as I know).
• New words: He can sign "more" and "please" although he isn't always willing to do so. He understands the words "drink"and "eat" for sure, as well as "hug" and "kiss" and we are working on signing "thank you".
• Giving hugs and kisses. Definitely my favorite by far. The first day I realized he understood this, I think I asked for a million hugs.
• "So soft" is something I say when he lays his head on his pillow pet or a blanket or anything soft. So now if I say "so soft" he lays his head on me or whatever I am holding. It's really sweet.
• Rocks. This kid loves rocks. Our neighbors have all rocks (desert landscape) and they are so nice to Corbin. Good thing because I think he steals a handful of rocks each time we walk by. We rarely walk farther than the corner anymore because he could sit and play with their rocks forever.
• Candy. Much to my chagrin he has discovered candy. It seems like kids quickly connect the sound of rustling packaging with delicious sweet treats because Corbin somehow always knows when you are holding candy. And he makes his intense desires known!
Another new development for us has been making new friends. We are so excited to be getting to know neighbors and ward members...finally. It seems like it has taken a long time to get acclimated to our new area, and I was really missing my old ward. But yesterday we met a mom with a boy Corbin's age at a yard sale across from our house. She lives down the street and came over tonight to introduce her husband to us. They are really sweet and I'm glad they live so close.
We also went tonight to visit a couple from our ward who has a baby boy that will turn 1 this month. The wife is from the Philippines so it was fun for Dustin to talk mission areas with her and mission foods, etc. She is a convert to the LDS church and so we will get to teach her new member lessons. I am so excited to be working as a missionary again. I've missed feeling a part of the work (my own fault, right? Many are called but few choose to do the work...)
Corbin loves being with other kids, but tonight I realized that he needs LOTS of wind down time before bed, especially if he's been stimulated by playing with other kids. He had a pretty bad tantrum before bed tonight. I am going to do my best to be home from 4:00 on in the evenings so we can have quiet time before bed. He just seems to do better that way. Sleep is a real battle right now. He's waking up multiple times in the night again, which is really frustrating. But I am praying for patience and I feel like the Lord is blessing me with the help I need.
We also made another discovery today. I call it play-group church. I wish it existed every Sunday, but today was Stake Conference so they had the auxiliary rooms set up for overflow. We checked it out and sure enough, three other young families were in there, toys on the floor, kids wandering the space, Cheerios and books to be shared among all. It was so nice. I heard about half of what was said in the meeting, but it was more than I would have heard wandering the halls with Corbin.
The most interesting thing I noticed, though (interesting for me as Corbin's mom), is that when nap time approached and you could tell that all the kids were needing to go home for naps, where the other kids wanted to be held or cuddled, drink bottles, etc., Corbin seemed to get more and more wild. It was evidence to me of what I read about in my sleep training book. There are different types of personalities which she lists in there, and I had pegged Corbin for a "spirited" boy. People have told me that he seems mellow, so then I questioned it. But in this book, she says that spirited children need more wind-down time before sleeping, and that they are prone to tantrums when they get overtired or over-stimulated. The trick, she says, is to avoid the tantrum by getting them down for naps or bed at the first sign of tiredness. The difficulty for me in that is that I can't tell Corbin is getting tired until he is so wild, I realize he is overtired. He just gets more and more wound up until I'm going nuts, and think, oh wait, he needs to be sleeping. Enter total tantrum...
Oh well, they are only little for a short while in the eternal scheme. I will try to keep remembering that.
Sunday, October 6, 2013
Walking Monster
Thursday, September 26, 2013
Temper Tantrums and Walking
So Corbin's first birthday is coming up in just a couple weeks, and I'm told it's normal at this age, but I can't handle the temper tantrums! For one thing, he's too big and strong for me to contain, so when you add his strong-willed personality and throwing his head back, I just have to put him down now.
So my question, how do you guide his head so it doesn't hit the floor, or at least doesn't hit hard, and still ignore the tantrum so it ends as quickly as possible? Is it feasible?
I hate to do a whole post on temper tantrums since it's not something I really want to remember about my sweet baby boy. But I figure it's also a sign that he is growing up and exerting his independence. It's so strange that he has his own ideas and can actually make choices about where he goes and what he does.
Speaking of choosing where to go, I just added "Walking" to the title since it's also a new development as Corbin approaches turning 1. Corbin now chooses HOW to get somewhere, which is REALLY strange. Although he still chooses crawling most the time (because it's faster), he is getting more and more stable on his feet. He LOVES walking while holding my hands because then he can run. He would do it all day if I was willing. But he's starting to take more steps on his own as well. This morning, I was in my bedroom and Corbin was in the hall, and I suddenly saw him toddle into my room on only two limbs. It was so crazy to see him! I get so proud of him when he tries.
Dustin and I laugh because he walks better when he is holding something in one or both hands. It's as if he trusts the objects to hold him up, like he's holding someone's hand(s). We call it his magic object which helps him walk.
Well, I'm done avoiding my chores. I'd love to hear some thoughts on tantrum control...
So my question, how do you guide his head so it doesn't hit the floor, or at least doesn't hit hard, and still ignore the tantrum so it ends as quickly as possible? Is it feasible?
I hate to do a whole post on temper tantrums since it's not something I really want to remember about my sweet baby boy. But I figure it's also a sign that he is growing up and exerting his independence. It's so strange that he has his own ideas and can actually make choices about where he goes and what he does.
Speaking of choosing where to go, I just added "Walking" to the title since it's also a new development as Corbin approaches turning 1. Corbin now chooses HOW to get somewhere, which is REALLY strange. Although he still chooses crawling most the time (because it's faster), he is getting more and more stable on his feet. He LOVES walking while holding my hands because then he can run. He would do it all day if I was willing. But he's starting to take more steps on his own as well. This morning, I was in my bedroom and Corbin was in the hall, and I suddenly saw him toddle into my room on only two limbs. It was so crazy to see him! I get so proud of him when he tries.
Dustin and I laugh because he walks better when he is holding something in one or both hands. It's as if he trusts the objects to hold him up, like he's holding someone's hand(s). We call it his magic object which helps him walk.
Well, I'm done avoiding my chores. I'd love to hear some thoughts on tantrum control...
Tuesday, September 17, 2013
The System
As I've started to really enjoy couponing, my system has evolved, but I'll give you the most simple way I started so you can go from there to find what works for you.
1. Buy a Sunday paper.
2. Clip coupons (There are methods where you don't clip them but you just save your inserts--I might start that at some point, but for now, I like to clip them so I know what I have.)
2b. I'll cover online coupons on another post so as not to bog you down. It's something I just added to my system.
3. Organize your coupons. (Another reason I avoided this--I thought you had to get all involved and buy a fancy binder, etc. All I did was put some paper in a regular 3-ring binder and stapled my coupons right to the papers. Each paper was for a different category.)
4. Look through the ads. You can get the paper ads or look them up online. I tend to do both. Some come in the mail to me and others are in the Sunday paper.
For St. George, I tend to do Smith's, Lin's, Walgreen's and Albertson's. Look at the ads one at a time and create shopping lists for each store as you go.
6. Pull the coupons you need for each store. I have an envelope for each store. As I look through the ads I write on my list anything that is on sale that I already need, or anything that is on sale that I have a coupon for that I can stock up on at a great price.
7. Put the list and the coupons in the envelope and go shop before the week ends.
FYI:
Smith's sales are Wed to Tues
Lin's are Mon to Mon (so on Mondays you get deals from both weeks)
Albertson's are Wed to Tues
Walgreen's are Mon to Sun
Walmart has ad match so you could potentially get all your shopping done there. I haven't tried it because it's easier for me to do 2-3 short trips a week with my baby, than to do one long trip that gets everything. Also, remember I coupon for my shopping fix so I "need" to go every once in a while so I don't go wander D.I. :-)
OTHER QUESTIONS YOU MIGHT HAVE
Expiration Dates
For better or for worse, I don't get bogged down in expiration dates. I'm sure there are some coupons that I miss out on but good deals are always coming around, I decided. The coupons that are for things that are most important to you will be at the forefront of your memory most likely so you'll be aware of their expiration dates. I just organize by category and call it good. Haven't missed anything too amazing yet. :-)
What's a Good Deal?
This has been something I've researched a little just out of curiosity, and not surprisingly, those extreme couponers have LOTS of information online. But rather than worry my pretty little head with so many numbers, I decided that trial and error is the best way to learn. I figure, if I'm getting even 25 cents off and item, I'm already paying less than I would have at that store so I just go for it. Then when I get home, I usually check walmart.com's price for several things to see if I got a good deal. It's not fool-proof, but I figure if I got it for cheaper than I would have at Walmart, I did pretty good.
The more you start to pay attention, the more aware you are of what's a good deal. There are also websites like Freebies2deals.com and XOXO Frugal Momma on Facebook which tell you when a price is good for stocking up. They also have links to online print-at-home coupons so you can get the exact deal they describe. I tend to check their posts now just to see what free things I can get each week.
Free Things
Set up an online account for your Smith's card and every Friday you can download that week's free item. Then you have a couple weeks to go pick it up. Smith's also has coupons that you can load right onto your Fresh Values card right from their site. The only bummer about those is that they override any paper coupon you might have used so you have to kinda remember which coupons you loaded.
For example, I could have gotten free toothpaste the other night using a 1.00 off coupon, but I forgot I had a 75 cents off coupon on my card. It took that first so I couldn't use the other. I still only paid 25 cents for toothpaste so no big deal, but it's an example....
Check Your Receipts
Extreme couponers organize better than me, I'm sure, but so far, my system has worked pretty well. One thing I've had to learn is to not be afraid of being the "crazy coupon lady." I check my receipts every time now--sometimes there are coupons that didn't get on there (like store coupons at Walgreen's that I forgot to point out to the clerk), or sales that didn't register (Smith's Buy 5 Save 5 deals and you accidentally only bought 4), or something that was listed in the ad that didn't ring up as listed. You have to pay attention and not be afraid to point things out. I've found that they are always really helpful at all the stores, and they can even go back in and fix your mistakes for you (like if you forget to give a coupon or don't buy enough of an item).
1. Buy a Sunday paper.
2. Clip coupons (There are methods where you don't clip them but you just save your inserts--I might start that at some point, but for now, I like to clip them so I know what I have.)
2b. I'll cover online coupons on another post so as not to bog you down. It's something I just added to my system.
3. Organize your coupons. (Another reason I avoided this--I thought you had to get all involved and buy a fancy binder, etc. All I did was put some paper in a regular 3-ring binder and stapled my coupons right to the papers. Each paper was for a different category.)
4. Look through the ads. You can get the paper ads or look them up online. I tend to do both. Some come in the mail to me and others are in the Sunday paper.
For St. George, I tend to do Smith's, Lin's, Walgreen's and Albertson's. Look at the ads one at a time and create shopping lists for each store as you go.
6. Pull the coupons you need for each store. I have an envelope for each store. As I look through the ads I write on my list anything that is on sale that I already need, or anything that is on sale that I have a coupon for that I can stock up on at a great price.
7. Put the list and the coupons in the envelope and go shop before the week ends.
FYI:
Smith's sales are Wed to Tues
Lin's are Mon to Mon (so on Mondays you get deals from both weeks)
Albertson's are Wed to Tues
Walgreen's are Mon to Sun
Walmart has ad match so you could potentially get all your shopping done there. I haven't tried it because it's easier for me to do 2-3 short trips a week with my baby, than to do one long trip that gets everything. Also, remember I coupon for my shopping fix so I "need" to go every once in a while so I don't go wander D.I. :-)
OTHER QUESTIONS YOU MIGHT HAVE
Expiration Dates
For better or for worse, I don't get bogged down in expiration dates. I'm sure there are some coupons that I miss out on but good deals are always coming around, I decided. The coupons that are for things that are most important to you will be at the forefront of your memory most likely so you'll be aware of their expiration dates. I just organize by category and call it good. Haven't missed anything too amazing yet. :-)
What's a Good Deal?
This has been something I've researched a little just out of curiosity, and not surprisingly, those extreme couponers have LOTS of information online. But rather than worry my pretty little head with so many numbers, I decided that trial and error is the best way to learn. I figure, if I'm getting even 25 cents off and item, I'm already paying less than I would have at that store so I just go for it. Then when I get home, I usually check walmart.com's price for several things to see if I got a good deal. It's not fool-proof, but I figure if I got it for cheaper than I would have at Walmart, I did pretty good.
The more you start to pay attention, the more aware you are of what's a good deal. There are also websites like Freebies2deals.com and XOXO Frugal Momma on Facebook which tell you when a price is good for stocking up. They also have links to online print-at-home coupons so you can get the exact deal they describe. I tend to check their posts now just to see what free things I can get each week.
Free Things
Set up an online account for your Smith's card and every Friday you can download that week's free item. Then you have a couple weeks to go pick it up. Smith's also has coupons that you can load right onto your Fresh Values card right from their site. The only bummer about those is that they override any paper coupon you might have used so you have to kinda remember which coupons you loaded.
For example, I could have gotten free toothpaste the other night using a 1.00 off coupon, but I forgot I had a 75 cents off coupon on my card. It took that first so I couldn't use the other. I still only paid 25 cents for toothpaste so no big deal, but it's an example....
Check Your Receipts
Extreme couponers organize better than me, I'm sure, but so far, my system has worked pretty well. One thing I've had to learn is to not be afraid of being the "crazy coupon lady." I check my receipts every time now--sometimes there are coupons that didn't get on there (like store coupons at Walgreen's that I forgot to point out to the clerk), or sales that didn't register (Smith's Buy 5 Save 5 deals and you accidentally only bought 4), or something that was listed in the ad that didn't ring up as listed. You have to pay attention and not be afraid to point things out. I've found that they are always really helpful at all the stores, and they can even go back in and fix your mistakes for you (like if you forget to give a coupon or don't buy enough of an item).
Thoughts from a less extreme (but enthusiastic) Couponer
Ok, so like I mentioned in my last post, we've put ourselves on a pretty strict budget and tried to start cooking at home more. Dustin encouraged me to try couponing and turns out, I love it. In fact, I'm probably getting border-line addicted, which might make the budget thing an issue again.
Some friends have asked my system so I said I'd post it here. I've drawn a few conclusions about couponing that I'll start out with. (I'll put the system itself in another post for those who aren't interested in or too busy for my phisophizing....)
THE HUNT
I enjoy couponing because I enjoy finding great deals. My mom taught me the art of thrift store and yard sale shopping ("treasure hunting" we sometimes call it) from a young age, and I've always enjoyed the search and the find. I didn't mind being in the store for hours to find a great deal, and I almost always found that thing (or things) I didn't know I needed. :-)
The thing is, at this point in my life, I don't need any more stuff. I don't need clothes, I don't need interesting retro furniture pieces that I'm going to re-make "one day," and I don't need more cookware or whatever else I tend to pick up at these stores and yard sales. And besides that, I don't have any room for any of it. But food? You always need food. It gets consumed regularly. So couponing has been killing two birds with one stone for our budget. I get my "treasure hunting high" from finding great deals at the grocery store and in the ads, so I save the money I would have spent at D.I. on things I don't need, and I also get the food we do need for less.
My point? If you are like me and like to shop, couponing might be a good outlet for you. Because for me, the shopping was about the hunt, not necessarily the catch. Ya, a new pair of jeans is fun, but the buyer's remorse is almost not worth it sometimes.
The opposite might be true as well. If you don't enjoy the shopping process, you might not be a couponer, or at least you might not enjoy it. But you can keep it pretty simple--I basically cut out a portion of Facebook time (which who doesn't need to do that anyway) to go through ads and clip coupons. I can also work on it while I watch a show at night with my hubby so it doesn't have to be your new hobby if you don't want it to be.
A COUPONER's FOCUS
Ok, one of the reasons I put off couponing before is because I felt like there weren't coupons for the things I buy. Well, that has changed in two ways.
1. I became a mom and so I do buy things now like Cheerios and boxed meals, which are things that OFTEN have coupons available.
2. I changed my focus to creating food storage. When something non-perishable is a great deal, you stock up. You have canned foods and boxed meals for a rainy day (like the end of the month when you've maxed your grocery budget and you are trying not to go back to the store till next paycheck)
Couponing has also made me more aware of the grocery ads. When you coupon, you want to use your coupon when the item is also on sale so you maximize your savings. By looking through the ads (something I rarely did before), I have started to notice when the things I DO buy (that I don't necessarily have coupons for), are on sale. I am able to get the best deals on produce, household items, milk, eggs, etc. just by going to the store that has them the cheapest that week. Most of my savings has actually come just from getting sale items, I think.
Along with changing my focus, couponing (and the things I can buy with coupons) have changed the way I cook. Where I never would have bought Hamburger Helper before, I couldn't resist buying it at 9 cents a box this week. I noticed that as a busy mom, it's nice to have something there in the pantry that is already a meal. I can add fresh vegetables and experiment with the sauce and such, but the seasoning/sauce packet that's already in the box gives me something to work with. I'm one who hates coming up with meal ideas and I tend to doubt my cooking abilities so for now, these boxed meals are actually helpful.
So now I admire my lovely stock of boxed and canned goods in my pantry rather than trying to stuff yet another dress into my closet (or chair into my living room--yes, that was happening), and I feel really good knowing that if money got tight, we would be alright for a while.
See the next post to see how I'm couponing. I'll keep it simple (in case you are like me--avoiding it because it's too much work to even read how to do it)
Some friends have asked my system so I said I'd post it here. I've drawn a few conclusions about couponing that I'll start out with. (I'll put the system itself in another post for those who aren't interested in or too busy for my phisophizing....)
THE HUNT
I enjoy couponing because I enjoy finding great deals. My mom taught me the art of thrift store and yard sale shopping ("treasure hunting" we sometimes call it) from a young age, and I've always enjoyed the search and the find. I didn't mind being in the store for hours to find a great deal, and I almost always found that thing (or things) I didn't know I needed. :-)
The thing is, at this point in my life, I don't need any more stuff. I don't need clothes, I don't need interesting retro furniture pieces that I'm going to re-make "one day," and I don't need more cookware or whatever else I tend to pick up at these stores and yard sales. And besides that, I don't have any room for any of it. But food? You always need food. It gets consumed regularly. So couponing has been killing two birds with one stone for our budget. I get my "treasure hunting high" from finding great deals at the grocery store and in the ads, so I save the money I would have spent at D.I. on things I don't need, and I also get the food we do need for less.
My point? If you are like me and like to shop, couponing might be a good outlet for you. Because for me, the shopping was about the hunt, not necessarily the catch. Ya, a new pair of jeans is fun, but the buyer's remorse is almost not worth it sometimes.
The opposite might be true as well. If you don't enjoy the shopping process, you might not be a couponer, or at least you might not enjoy it. But you can keep it pretty simple--I basically cut out a portion of Facebook time (which who doesn't need to do that anyway) to go through ads and clip coupons. I can also work on it while I watch a show at night with my hubby so it doesn't have to be your new hobby if you don't want it to be.
A COUPONER's FOCUS
Ok, one of the reasons I put off couponing before is because I felt like there weren't coupons for the things I buy. Well, that has changed in two ways.
1. I became a mom and so I do buy things now like Cheerios and boxed meals, which are things that OFTEN have coupons available.
2. I changed my focus to creating food storage. When something non-perishable is a great deal, you stock up. You have canned foods and boxed meals for a rainy day (like the end of the month when you've maxed your grocery budget and you are trying not to go back to the store till next paycheck)
Couponing has also made me more aware of the grocery ads. When you coupon, you want to use your coupon when the item is also on sale so you maximize your savings. By looking through the ads (something I rarely did before), I have started to notice when the things I DO buy (that I don't necessarily have coupons for), are on sale. I am able to get the best deals on produce, household items, milk, eggs, etc. just by going to the store that has them the cheapest that week. Most of my savings has actually come just from getting sale items, I think.
Along with changing my focus, couponing (and the things I can buy with coupons) have changed the way I cook. Where I never would have bought Hamburger Helper before, I couldn't resist buying it at 9 cents a box this week. I noticed that as a busy mom, it's nice to have something there in the pantry that is already a meal. I can add fresh vegetables and experiment with the sauce and such, but the seasoning/sauce packet that's already in the box gives me something to work with. I'm one who hates coming up with meal ideas and I tend to doubt my cooking abilities so for now, these boxed meals are actually helpful.
So now I admire my lovely stock of boxed and canned goods in my pantry rather than trying to stuff yet another dress into my closet (or chair into my living room--yes, that was happening), and I feel really good knowing that if money got tight, we would be alright for a while.
See the next post to see how I'm couponing. I'll keep it simple (in case you are like me--avoiding it because it's too much work to even read how to do it)
Monday, September 9, 2013
Two Year Anniversary
To commemorate our two year anniversary, I want to take a minute to remember my favorite moments from the past two years (since I didn't do it last year, I'll include both years, but hopefully I can keep up for the next years...)
These are in no particular order, other than the order that they come to mind.
Corbin's birth, of course.
It seems like most of this second year has revolved around Corbin and being parents. That's probably because we had Corbin just after our first anniversary, which means we really have spent our whole second year of marriage learning how to be mom and dad.
The first year of marriage was learning to be husband and wife. However, nothing throws a wrench in those roles like adding a baby to the mix. Then again, I was pregnant most of our first year of marriage, so I'm not sure I can really say that year was "normal" either.
I remember a conversation Dustin and I had early on in my pregnancy. I was recalling how in my single years I always heard about the "wait one year rule." I don't know if it is just in Mormon culture, but there seems to be this unwritten "rule" or recommendation that couples wait a year to get pregnant. Someone told me once that it was a good idea because the first year of marriage is a lot of adjusting and one person even told me once that the first year was the hardest. Dustin and I said that our first year had seemed quite easy, and we really didn't feel like we had had to make that many adjustments. We wondered if it was our awesome personalities ;-) or the fact that we dated a good amount of time (also following the one year "rule"), but we were glad we had lucked out to have such a smooth ride that first year.
Oh wait, looking back I realize now that we were having that conversation probably in March, which puts us at 6 months of marriage. I'm thinking now that we were probably still in the honeymoon phase. Besides that, we were two working DINKS (dual income no kids). We both had jobs we liked that we chose, we got to spend a lot of time together doing pretty much whatever we wanted, and we ate out...a lot. It's like my friends Summer and Joel call it--married without kids is "when we were single." This isn't to say that our marriage has been jeopardized since having a baby, but merely an observation that even if we had waited the "suggested" one year, we still might not have faced these adjustments--because it was the baby and the total changing of our roles and responsibilities which has tested our relationship the most.
So September 2011 to March 2012, pretty blissful.
Enter pregnancy...I don't necessarily remember a lot of arguments or "adjusting" while I was pregnant. I think it's because I felt so yucky in the first part that pretty much anything was considered acceptable behavior. Dustin was pretty good about catering to my every whim. And since we were both still working, we just ate out a lot still...lots and lots of Cafe Rio.
The reason I mention the eating out is because it's the most recent big change we've made. As we've entered our grown-up married life, we've lost one income but added more expenses. Weird how that works... Looking over our budget, it became clear to me that I'm going to have to adopt some domestic goddess skills that I've avoided for almost thirty years. We've cut out most eating out (I think we've only gone out once or twice in the last two months), and I now cook at home fairly regularly, using the groceries I bought with couponing and sale watching.
I really did have it made that first year of marriage. Dustin did almost all of the cooking, and especially when I was pregnant, he probably did all of it. He's a better cook, but I'm learning and improving now that he has given me the space to do so. It isn't that he expects me to be barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen, but I'm just discovering that I desire to be at home with Corbin. I do appreciate that Dustin supports my dancing, and I am still able to teach one class a day, and even will be doing some of my own dancing starting this week. But I had a real desire over the summer to be at home more and have time to be the kind of mom I feel Corbin deserves. So I quit studio teaching in the evenings and have really enjoyed being at home with my family every night this semester.
Ok, this was supposed to be about highlights from the last two years and it's turning into lessons. Back to the point...
Our house has definitely consumed a lot of our second year of marriage. We started renovating in February and are still in the middle of it. The house gets more liveable each day, but I can't wait to have a kitchen sink--seriously, we have everything but the kitchen sink...
We got our dryer installed today, so I think I've line dried our clothes for the last time (barring an issue with our dryer at some future point--knock on wood). The first time I hung the clothes out on the line, Dustin was out working in the yard, and I actually wore an apron (to have the clothespins in the pockets). Corbin was napping in the house. I felt like June Cleaver, and I loved it. Of course, it only took a couple weeks for the rose-colored glasses to get foggy in the heat of summer and the novelty wore off.
Then the power went out and we had to stay with Dustin's brother for about a month. I was grateful to them, but that setback was a real challenge for our marriage. We learned a lot about communication, and it was the springboard for me to learn how to sleep train and budget--so I guess in hindsight it can now be numbered among our blessings.
Those are the big things--house and baby. But there were lots of other small things that have made these two years special...
Trip to California with my parents last summer.
Hawaii for Spring Break this year.
Family reunions on both sides including my parents' 50th wedding anniversary and Corbin's first Lagoon trip.
My parents moving six hours closer to us so we can have birthdays and holidays and even long weekends together again.
Making some great friends in our first ward and starting in a new ward this year.
And some personal accomplishments for both of us...
Dustin has sold several pieces of furniture that he refinished and is starting to build custom pieces.
He built us a beautiful custom bed as well as all the amazing work he's done on our house.
I went on my first tour with St. George Dance Company to perform in Salt Lake.
I enjoyed a part-time position at Dixie State College for one semester where I had an office and taught several classes a week.
I'm sure there are things I've forgotten, but I hope this gets the point across that I'm really happy I married Dustin, and I understand more each day the advice my dad gave me when we got engaged. He said that most of life feels like "cabin fever" or "island fever" so you want to make sure the person you marry is someone that you have fun with even when you are otherwise "stuck" in one place. Dustin and I have never lived in more than 800 square feet, and yet, I love sharing it with him. Happy 2nd Anniversary!
These are in no particular order, other than the order that they come to mind.
Corbin's birth, of course.
It seems like most of this second year has revolved around Corbin and being parents. That's probably because we had Corbin just after our first anniversary, which means we really have spent our whole second year of marriage learning how to be mom and dad.
The first year of marriage was learning to be husband and wife. However, nothing throws a wrench in those roles like adding a baby to the mix. Then again, I was pregnant most of our first year of marriage, so I'm not sure I can really say that year was "normal" either.
I remember a conversation Dustin and I had early on in my pregnancy. I was recalling how in my single years I always heard about the "wait one year rule." I don't know if it is just in Mormon culture, but there seems to be this unwritten "rule" or recommendation that couples wait a year to get pregnant. Someone told me once that it was a good idea because the first year of marriage is a lot of adjusting and one person even told me once that the first year was the hardest. Dustin and I said that our first year had seemed quite easy, and we really didn't feel like we had had to make that many adjustments. We wondered if it was our awesome personalities ;-) or the fact that we dated a good amount of time (also following the one year "rule"), but we were glad we had lucked out to have such a smooth ride that first year.
Oh wait, looking back I realize now that we were having that conversation probably in March, which puts us at 6 months of marriage. I'm thinking now that we were probably still in the honeymoon phase. Besides that, we were two working DINKS (dual income no kids). We both had jobs we liked that we chose, we got to spend a lot of time together doing pretty much whatever we wanted, and we ate out...a lot. It's like my friends Summer and Joel call it--married without kids is "when we were single." This isn't to say that our marriage has been jeopardized since having a baby, but merely an observation that even if we had waited the "suggested" one year, we still might not have faced these adjustments--because it was the baby and the total changing of our roles and responsibilities which has tested our relationship the most.
So September 2011 to March 2012, pretty blissful.
Enter pregnancy...I don't necessarily remember a lot of arguments or "adjusting" while I was pregnant. I think it's because I felt so yucky in the first part that pretty much anything was considered acceptable behavior. Dustin was pretty good about catering to my every whim. And since we were both still working, we just ate out a lot still...lots and lots of Cafe Rio.
The reason I mention the eating out is because it's the most recent big change we've made. As we've entered our grown-up married life, we've lost one income but added more expenses. Weird how that works... Looking over our budget, it became clear to me that I'm going to have to adopt some domestic goddess skills that I've avoided for almost thirty years. We've cut out most eating out (I think we've only gone out once or twice in the last two months), and I now cook at home fairly regularly, using the groceries I bought with couponing and sale watching.
I really did have it made that first year of marriage. Dustin did almost all of the cooking, and especially when I was pregnant, he probably did all of it. He's a better cook, but I'm learning and improving now that he has given me the space to do so. It isn't that he expects me to be barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen, but I'm just discovering that I desire to be at home with Corbin. I do appreciate that Dustin supports my dancing, and I am still able to teach one class a day, and even will be doing some of my own dancing starting this week. But I had a real desire over the summer to be at home more and have time to be the kind of mom I feel Corbin deserves. So I quit studio teaching in the evenings and have really enjoyed being at home with my family every night this semester.
Ok, this was supposed to be about highlights from the last two years and it's turning into lessons. Back to the point...
Our house has definitely consumed a lot of our second year of marriage. We started renovating in February and are still in the middle of it. The house gets more liveable each day, but I can't wait to have a kitchen sink--seriously, we have everything but the kitchen sink...
We got our dryer installed today, so I think I've line dried our clothes for the last time (barring an issue with our dryer at some future point--knock on wood). The first time I hung the clothes out on the line, Dustin was out working in the yard, and I actually wore an apron (to have the clothespins in the pockets). Corbin was napping in the house. I felt like June Cleaver, and I loved it. Of course, it only took a couple weeks for the rose-colored glasses to get foggy in the heat of summer and the novelty wore off.
Then the power went out and we had to stay with Dustin's brother for about a month. I was grateful to them, but that setback was a real challenge for our marriage. We learned a lot about communication, and it was the springboard for me to learn how to sleep train and budget--so I guess in hindsight it can now be numbered among our blessings.
Those are the big things--house and baby. But there were lots of other small things that have made these two years special...
Trip to California with my parents last summer.
Hawaii for Spring Break this year.
Family reunions on both sides including my parents' 50th wedding anniversary and Corbin's first Lagoon trip.
My parents moving six hours closer to us so we can have birthdays and holidays and even long weekends together again.
Making some great friends in our first ward and starting in a new ward this year.
And some personal accomplishments for both of us...
Dustin has sold several pieces of furniture that he refinished and is starting to build custom pieces.
He built us a beautiful custom bed as well as all the amazing work he's done on our house.
I went on my first tour with St. George Dance Company to perform in Salt Lake.
I enjoyed a part-time position at Dixie State College for one semester where I had an office and taught several classes a week.
I'm sure there are things I've forgotten, but I hope this gets the point across that I'm really happy I married Dustin, and I understand more each day the advice my dad gave me when we got engaged. He said that most of life feels like "cabin fever" or "island fever" so you want to make sure the person you marry is someone that you have fun with even when you are otherwise "stuck" in one place. Dustin and I have never lived in more than 800 square feet, and yet, I love sharing it with him. Happy 2nd Anniversary!
Monday, August 12, 2013
Happy 10 Months!
Wow! I can't believe it's already been ten months since Corbin joined our family! With all the changes going on in our lives (moving in and out of our house as we renovate, adjusting to balancing work and home, as well as all the normal parenting life changes), I feel like my journaling and blogging have fallen to the wayside. I am a little sad tonight to think of all the experiences, memories, milestones, and lessons learned that haven't been recorded and may be lost somewhere in my mind until maybe the Resurrection when I can have a perfect remembrance restored to me.
So I decided I better get some things in writing to celebrate Corbin's 10 month birthday tomorrow...
New Tricks
In the last month or two, Corbin has learned to clap. He loves to clap and he'll even yell a sort of "Yay" while he claps. Sometimes while he plays I'll turn on "So You Think You Can Dance" to entertain me while I keep him from pulling too many books off the shelves, or yanking appliances down onto him by their cords, etc. etc. Whenever he hears the studio audience applause, he stops what he's doing and claps and yells "yay" with them.
We started to teach him sign language. Whenever I say "more" and show him the sign, he responds by clapping. I decided that is close enough so I always give him more after he claps. The sign he actually seems to understand though is "please." I was so impressed with this. One night he was playing with a little bottle and Dustin took it from him, which made him start to fuss. Dustin said, "No, we don't throw tantrums to get what we want." I thought, He's a little young to be trying to reason with him, hon. But sure enough, Dustin showed him the "please" sign and then Corbin stopped fussing and did it back to him. I was amazed! We are still working on "Thank you".
Corbin continues to pull himself up on anything he can get his hands on, and he loves doing the finger walk. Fortunately for me, he's the perfect height to where I don't really have to bend over to help him walk that way. In just the last month, he started to push from a squat to a stand all by himself, so we figure it won't be long till he's walking. In the meantime, his crawl has gotten faster and faster. Today, he crawled upstream in the splash pad. He doesn't put his knees down anymore which I think helps him go faster. For a while, he had a tripod crawl with only the left knee down, but now he usually keeps both up and does sort of a bear crawl.
Best trick is of course the one that has been all-consuming for me the last week or so--SLEEPING! Definitely want to remember some of the things I've learned so I can hopefully have a smoother time with baby #2 (Not making any announcements with that).
Favorites
Corbin doesn't really have a lovey or a stuffed animal or anything he seems to cling to--something I tried to introduce for sleep training, but he seems to prefer to do things by himself. He was a binky baby for a while but even that has lost its luster over the last couple months. I don't mind because I figure it saves me the battle of weaning him from it when he's older. Although, I wonder if it will be useful when I start weaning him from nursing. We shall see...
He has always loved to have blankets or sheets or clothes, or any material really, flowing over his face. It's always been a way to make him laugh. But just this weekend, on our drive home from Salt Lake, he started to play peek-a-boo himself. He pulled the blanket up over his face and then pulled it down to smile at me, and I'd say "peek-a-boo" so he did it over and over.
Another game he started playing on the trip was a little echo game. He'd make a sound like a squeak or a moan or a squawk or a honk and when I would repeat it, he'd laugh and laugh. Dustin taught him months ago how to make the "ba ba ba" sound by hitting your mouth while you "ah"--he loves it so now he does it to calm himself down when he's bored or fussy in the car, and also he tries to do it to me when I hold him.
Here's a couple cute videos and photos I don't think I've shared yet...
First Red Vine. Dad had been waiting what he thought was FOREVER to let him try a Red Vine. I think I gave in at 6 months, and yes, Corbin loved it.
Wagon ride at Grandma Bonnie's with cousin Eben.
Love the toys at Grandma's house
Strawberry yogurt is definitely a favorite food
Eating big kid food with mom.
So I decided I better get some things in writing to celebrate Corbin's 10 month birthday tomorrow...
New Tricks
In the last month or two, Corbin has learned to clap. He loves to clap and he'll even yell a sort of "Yay" while he claps. Sometimes while he plays I'll turn on "So You Think You Can Dance" to entertain me while I keep him from pulling too many books off the shelves, or yanking appliances down onto him by their cords, etc. etc. Whenever he hears the studio audience applause, he stops what he's doing and claps and yells "yay" with them.
We started to teach him sign language. Whenever I say "more" and show him the sign, he responds by clapping. I decided that is close enough so I always give him more after he claps. The sign he actually seems to understand though is "please." I was so impressed with this. One night he was playing with a little bottle and Dustin took it from him, which made him start to fuss. Dustin said, "No, we don't throw tantrums to get what we want." I thought, He's a little young to be trying to reason with him, hon. But sure enough, Dustin showed him the "please" sign and then Corbin stopped fussing and did it back to him. I was amazed! We are still working on "Thank you".
Corbin continues to pull himself up on anything he can get his hands on, and he loves doing the finger walk. Fortunately for me, he's the perfect height to where I don't really have to bend over to help him walk that way. In just the last month, he started to push from a squat to a stand all by himself, so we figure it won't be long till he's walking. In the meantime, his crawl has gotten faster and faster. Today, he crawled upstream in the splash pad. He doesn't put his knees down anymore which I think helps him go faster. For a while, he had a tripod crawl with only the left knee down, but now he usually keeps both up and does sort of a bear crawl.
Best trick is of course the one that has been all-consuming for me the last week or so--SLEEPING! Definitely want to remember some of the things I've learned so I can hopefully have a smoother time with baby #2 (Not making any announcements with that).
Favorites
Corbin doesn't really have a lovey or a stuffed animal or anything he seems to cling to--something I tried to introduce for sleep training, but he seems to prefer to do things by himself. He was a binky baby for a while but even that has lost its luster over the last couple months. I don't mind because I figure it saves me the battle of weaning him from it when he's older. Although, I wonder if it will be useful when I start weaning him from nursing. We shall see...
He has always loved to have blankets or sheets or clothes, or any material really, flowing over his face. It's always been a way to make him laugh. But just this weekend, on our drive home from Salt Lake, he started to play peek-a-boo himself. He pulled the blanket up over his face and then pulled it down to smile at me, and I'd say "peek-a-boo" so he did it over and over.
Another game he started playing on the trip was a little echo game. He'd make a sound like a squeak or a moan or a squawk or a honk and when I would repeat it, he'd laugh and laugh. Dustin taught him months ago how to make the "ba ba ba" sound by hitting your mouth while you "ah"--he loves it so now he does it to calm himself down when he's bored or fussy in the car, and also he tries to do it to me when I hold him.
Here's a couple cute videos and photos I don't think I've shared yet...
Here's an old video of a funny discovery we made about Corbin's enthusiasm for sounds. He still loves to drum on any hard surface he can reach. We also turn on music in the mornings and he starts bouncing as soon as he hears any kind of rhythm.
Love Grandpa Tom and love the camera
First camping trip with mom and dad. Loved the tent.
Looking back at some old photos and videos makes me realize how truly amazing children are. Every once in a while I look at Corbin and wonder at how each day he grows and learns and becomes this little person that was not in the world and now suddenly is and will be. My world is forever changed because of him, and who knows what else in the world might be different for his being in it. What an amazing gift Heavenly Father has given me to be Corbin's mommy.
Love you baby boy! Happy 10 months!
Sleeping Update
Just had to record the great news. One day before Corbin's 10 month birthday he learned to go to sleep. I took him in for a nap this morning, he fussed a little when the lights went out because he knew what was coming. But as soon as I laid him in his bed, he rolled right onto his side and began his little soothing sounds. We're two for two this afternoon on not fighting sleep, and hoping the trend keeps up for bedtime tonight.
We just got back from Salt Lake and I was so worried that the trip would mess up his sleep training. My two sweet girlfriends watched him while I performed and had to put him down, which means he had to do a little crying it out. I could tell that had worried him a little when I tried to put him down last night. He wouldn't let me leave the room, but would try to sleep as long as my hand was on his back. He was even swinging his arm back occasionally to make sure my arm was still there with my hand. I knew he needed to feel safe since he'd slept somewhere new as well as having someone new put him to bed for the last three nights, so I wasn't bothered by it.
Anyway, this morning and this afternoon he didn't need me to stay in the room, or keep my hand on his back. He's doing great and I'm so proud of him!
We just got back from Salt Lake and I was so worried that the trip would mess up his sleep training. My two sweet girlfriends watched him while I performed and had to put him down, which means he had to do a little crying it out. I could tell that had worried him a little when I tried to put him down last night. He wouldn't let me leave the room, but would try to sleep as long as my hand was on his back. He was even swinging his arm back occasionally to make sure my arm was still there with my hand. I knew he needed to feel safe since he'd slept somewhere new as well as having someone new put him to bed for the last three nights, so I wasn't bothered by it.
Anyway, this morning and this afternoon he didn't need me to stay in the room, or keep my hand on his back. He's doing great and I'm so proud of him!
Monday, August 5, 2013
Our Sleep Training Journey
Yes, I am writing on my blog again, a sign that Corbin is finally taking a nap that I don't need to take with him. This is amazing, of course, and yet, I have this funny sadness about it.
Corbin has been an all-night snacker for the last almost ten months. (I can't believe he is almost ten months!) I used to say, Corbin is a "bad sleeper" until I read a sleep training book which helped me see that most of his issues were results of things I had done. I beat myself up about that for a day or two until I realized that I did what worked for the time, and now it's not working anymore. This isn't a post about poor Jennie who didn't get any sleep, or what not to do, but just some thoughts I'm having as Corbin and I enter a new phase, one that hopefully gives Dustin and me some much-needed time together again. Not to mention will make me a happier, more patient wife and mother.
For those interested in sleep-training thoughts, I'll share this. I'm reading a book called "The Child Whisperer Solves All Your Problems." As I've studied sleep training methods, I've come to the conclusion that you should do whichever method you think you can be consistent in. In fact, one study of five different methods found that they all work equally well, provided that the parents are consistent. The gist of Child Whisperer's "pick-up/put-down" method is that you let your baby cry it out, but you stay right there with him. Each time he stands up, you lay him back down. And you keep laying him back down until he gives up and "self-soothes" to sleep.
Corbin's been pretty textbook so far. Laura Hogg (the author) says not to be surprised if it takes 100 put-downs, and Corbin took at least that. Dustin thinks it was two hours of crying, but he was just listening from the hallway. I was in there talking to Corbin and laying him down and came out and thought it had only been an hour.
But the results have amazed me. Already on day 2, when I turned off the lights for nap-time, Corbin started fussing a little. He knew what was coming, but he took his lay-down like a champ, rolled over and began to self-soothe.
This is what surprised me. Even though I was so excited that he wasn't going to fight me, I had this sad feeling that my baby felt defeated or abandoned. I'd never actually abandoned him, which is why I liked the method better than full Cry-it-out. But for some reason, I felt better laying him down over and over and hearing his cries of protest than hearing those sad little sounds of defeat.
I know he feels better--today was the first day he woke up happy since he was a little tiny baby. And I know I feel better--today was the first day I didn't need to nap myself when I put him down. I've had time to blog, fold laundry, check Facebook, and eat my own lunch hands-free :-) I feel like I'm establishing some control and order in my house again. And yet, I notice that I want to go cuddle him so badly.
So this is what I've discovered...I think I secretly like nursing my baby to sleep. I like holding my sleeping baby in my arms. I like snuggling him in my bed. It makes my sleep crappy. It strains my relationship with my husband. It even sometimes strains my relationship with my baby. I feel more like a giant binky than a guide and support that can capably care for his physical and emotional needs. And yet, as I strive to correct those issues, I notice this sadness that my baby is growing up. I think that's part of what makes those self-soothing noises he makes hard to hear.
So this is what "Baby Hungry" feels like...
Funny thing is, I was just telling my sisters-in-law that I don't think I'll ever feel baby hungry. People have told me before that once my baby isn't so baby I would feel it and I didn't believe them. Corbin seemed like more than I could handle sometimes. I couldn't imagine doing it all over again. Even though I knew deep down I would. I just wasn't sure I'd ever really WANT to do it again :-)
In this journey, I've come to a second conclusion. I read about sleep training options while I was pregnant and right after Corbin was born. But I had decided to feed on demand and see how it goes. I guess part of my homebirth mentality was carried through--let nature take its course, let the baby's natural rhythms determine his schedule, etc. I do think that Corbin established a schedule and we got some sort of routine established, but it was pretty casual and never something that I really involved Dustin in. So when I started teaching again a couple nights a week, and then we moved, and then he got sick, and then he was teething, and then we moved again, and then his room was too hot without AC, and then we moved again, and then we traveled...all this time I kept saying, when things get back to normal, we will sleep train.
And here we are, six months of Corbin's life have passed in this "not normal" state. And that's when it hit me, this is life. We were two days from being back in our own house, with AC. But we were still at Dustin's brothers where I didn't feel it was very thoughtful to start letting my baby cry for hours in the night. And I went to put him down for a nap and just started pick-up/put-down. I thought, we are starting today. And if it messes up his sleep when we get to our new house, we will do pick-up/put-down again. And if it messes up his sleep when we go to Salt Lake this weekend, we will do pick-up/put-down again. Because life is never just stay at home all day, all week, have the perfect temperature, have a tummy that feels great, have no teeth coming in, etc. etc. And when Corbin is a grown-up, he needs to be able to go to sleep in less than ideal conditions.
So once I realized sleep is a life skill, I felt ready to teach it to Corbin. And once I started pick-up/put-down, I knew I had to see it through. It's actually been a good method for me. I've been pleased with the quick results and I feel like it's something I have the stamina and patience for. Funny how I can feel patient for hours doing our dance of pick-up/put-down, but I was losing it to nurse him back to sleep for five minutes every two hours. It all has to do with feeling in control, and feeling like I am teaching him, rather than perpetuating a bad habit which I didn't see an end to in the near future.
That's probably way more thoughts than I ever thought I'd have about sleep training. To summarize, my advice to new moms. Choose something that you think you can stick to--even when you are dead tired, even when you are traveling, even when you are moving, and so on and so forth.
Here's a little video I just found in my archives. I used to think the self-soothing sounds were cute enough to film, apparently :-)
Corbin has been an all-night snacker for the last almost ten months. (I can't believe he is almost ten months!) I used to say, Corbin is a "bad sleeper" until I read a sleep training book which helped me see that most of his issues were results of things I had done. I beat myself up about that for a day or two until I realized that I did what worked for the time, and now it's not working anymore. This isn't a post about poor Jennie who didn't get any sleep, or what not to do, but just some thoughts I'm having as Corbin and I enter a new phase, one that hopefully gives Dustin and me some much-needed time together again. Not to mention will make me a happier, more patient wife and mother.
For those interested in sleep-training thoughts, I'll share this. I'm reading a book called "The Child Whisperer Solves All Your Problems." As I've studied sleep training methods, I've come to the conclusion that you should do whichever method you think you can be consistent in. In fact, one study of five different methods found that they all work equally well, provided that the parents are consistent. The gist of Child Whisperer's "pick-up/put-down" method is that you let your baby cry it out, but you stay right there with him. Each time he stands up, you lay him back down. And you keep laying him back down until he gives up and "self-soothes" to sleep.
Corbin's been pretty textbook so far. Laura Hogg (the author) says not to be surprised if it takes 100 put-downs, and Corbin took at least that. Dustin thinks it was two hours of crying, but he was just listening from the hallway. I was in there talking to Corbin and laying him down and came out and thought it had only been an hour.
But the results have amazed me. Already on day 2, when I turned off the lights for nap-time, Corbin started fussing a little. He knew what was coming, but he took his lay-down like a champ, rolled over and began to self-soothe.
This is what surprised me. Even though I was so excited that he wasn't going to fight me, I had this sad feeling that my baby felt defeated or abandoned. I'd never actually abandoned him, which is why I liked the method better than full Cry-it-out. But for some reason, I felt better laying him down over and over and hearing his cries of protest than hearing those sad little sounds of defeat.
I know he feels better--today was the first day he woke up happy since he was a little tiny baby. And I know I feel better--today was the first day I didn't need to nap myself when I put him down. I've had time to blog, fold laundry, check Facebook, and eat my own lunch hands-free :-) I feel like I'm establishing some control and order in my house again. And yet, I notice that I want to go cuddle him so badly.
So this is what I've discovered...I think I secretly like nursing my baby to sleep. I like holding my sleeping baby in my arms. I like snuggling him in my bed. It makes my sleep crappy. It strains my relationship with my husband. It even sometimes strains my relationship with my baby. I feel more like a giant binky than a guide and support that can capably care for his physical and emotional needs. And yet, as I strive to correct those issues, I notice this sadness that my baby is growing up. I think that's part of what makes those self-soothing noises he makes hard to hear.
So this is what "Baby Hungry" feels like...
Funny thing is, I was just telling my sisters-in-law that I don't think I'll ever feel baby hungry. People have told me before that once my baby isn't so baby I would feel it and I didn't believe them. Corbin seemed like more than I could handle sometimes. I couldn't imagine doing it all over again. Even though I knew deep down I would. I just wasn't sure I'd ever really WANT to do it again :-)
In this journey, I've come to a second conclusion. I read about sleep training options while I was pregnant and right after Corbin was born. But I had decided to feed on demand and see how it goes. I guess part of my homebirth mentality was carried through--let nature take its course, let the baby's natural rhythms determine his schedule, etc. I do think that Corbin established a schedule and we got some sort of routine established, but it was pretty casual and never something that I really involved Dustin in. So when I started teaching again a couple nights a week, and then we moved, and then he got sick, and then he was teething, and then we moved again, and then his room was too hot without AC, and then we moved again, and then we traveled...all this time I kept saying, when things get back to normal, we will sleep train.
And here we are, six months of Corbin's life have passed in this "not normal" state. And that's when it hit me, this is life. We were two days from being back in our own house, with AC. But we were still at Dustin's brothers where I didn't feel it was very thoughtful to start letting my baby cry for hours in the night. And I went to put him down for a nap and just started pick-up/put-down. I thought, we are starting today. And if it messes up his sleep when we get to our new house, we will do pick-up/put-down again. And if it messes up his sleep when we go to Salt Lake this weekend, we will do pick-up/put-down again. Because life is never just stay at home all day, all week, have the perfect temperature, have a tummy that feels great, have no teeth coming in, etc. etc. And when Corbin is a grown-up, he needs to be able to go to sleep in less than ideal conditions.
So once I realized sleep is a life skill, I felt ready to teach it to Corbin. And once I started pick-up/put-down, I knew I had to see it through. It's actually been a good method for me. I've been pleased with the quick results and I feel like it's something I have the stamina and patience for. Funny how I can feel patient for hours doing our dance of pick-up/put-down, but I was losing it to nurse him back to sleep for five minutes every two hours. It all has to do with feeling in control, and feeling like I am teaching him, rather than perpetuating a bad habit which I didn't see an end to in the near future.
That's probably way more thoughts than I ever thought I'd have about sleep training. To summarize, my advice to new moms. Choose something that you think you can stick to--even when you are dead tired, even when you are traveling, even when you are moving, and so on and so forth.
Sunday, May 26, 2013
Inch Worm Crawl
We've been so busy trying to renovate our house and there is so much to update, including the progress on the house. But I didn't want to miss out on sharing Corbin's latest achievement. His inch-worm crawl looks like he's doing the worm. I think he'll be a great break dancer!
Check him out!
Check him out!
Monday, January 14, 2013
Glad to be Enjoying My Here and Now
I held Corbin while he napped last night for a while, and then cuddled him this morning so he and I could both get a couple more hours of sleep. And then I checked in on my SIL and her husband. I asked if they felt like zombies yet. He said their little girl is sleeping all day and awake all night and he thinks he might have gotten 2-3 hours of sleep last night. The memories suddenly flooded my mind of how awful that adjustment is to make. I now feel very glad to be in my here and now with my 3 month old boy that has a little bit of a schedule and sleeps sometimes 4-5 hours at a time at night. Even though last night was an up every two hours kind of night, it has somehow become easier to handle now. I guess I remember now why I was so anxious to get back to "normal" or find some kind of new normal. I'll just keep enjoying my here and now and not look back :-)
Saturday, January 12, 2013
Enjoying the Here and Now
It seems like with every milestone in my life, I look back and wish I would have enjoyed more the time getting there. When I got married, I wished I would have enjoyed dating my husband more. When I had Corbin, I wished I would have enjoyed newlywed life more. I guess I'm just one to look forward to "the next big thing" but I think sometimes it robs me of the beauty of here and now.
I realized this weakness, if it is a weakness, again this week. My sister-in-law had her first baby yesterday, and I noticed that while she was in labor, I kept thinking how jealous I was that in the very near future she was going to have her brand new baby placed on her chest. It made me realize how beautiful that experience was when Corbin was first placed on my chest. The thing is, I was so exhausted in that moment, it was hard to enjoy it then. But that moment has become more special in my mind and heart as I've come to better know and love my baby boy.
My SIL came home from the hospital last night. Since we rent an apartment attached to their house, I'm somewhat aware of what's going on with them so I saw how they seemed to just stay quietly in their house all day today, enjoying their new baby and getting much needed rest I would imagine. I was taken back to those first days and weeks of Corbin's life and wished I could take back all the stress and panic I felt about wanting to have the house clean, or wishing I could just feel good enough to get back to "normal" life. My older sister would tell me to just enjoy having only one baby because it would be the only time in my life when I could have only one tiny baby to consume my whole existence. It's not that I wish to go back to Corbin's newborn days because honestly, I have loved each new phase that he has entered so far. But seeing my SIL with her new tiny baby made me realize again how quickly time passes, how quickly babies grow up, and how unimportant it is to me now to know that my laundry and dishes were done those first weeks of Corbin's life. I only now realize what my sister meant that this was the only time I'd have one baby that I can devote all my time to, and I'm wishing I hadn't been in such a rush to figure out how to "get things done" while he slept, and just let myself hold his little snuggly body during those naps.
Tomorrow he'll be three months old. He started the year out rolling from his back to his stomach (although he hasn't done it since). At Christmas he weighed 16 pounds and he's already wearing some 6 and even 9 month clothes. I love how responsive he is now--he loves to smile back at people when they smile at him, and he squeals when I kiss his cheeks. I can't wait till he gives me a real laugh. He's totally fascinated with his hands now and loves to try to put his whole fist in his mouth, sometimes gagging himself in his efforts.
I never realized what a special gift having a child would be and I'm so grateful Heavenly Father let me be Corbin's mommy!
I realized this weakness, if it is a weakness, again this week. My sister-in-law had her first baby yesterday, and I noticed that while she was in labor, I kept thinking how jealous I was that in the very near future she was going to have her brand new baby placed on her chest. It made me realize how beautiful that experience was when Corbin was first placed on my chest. The thing is, I was so exhausted in that moment, it was hard to enjoy it then. But that moment has become more special in my mind and heart as I've come to better know and love my baby boy.
My SIL came home from the hospital last night. Since we rent an apartment attached to their house, I'm somewhat aware of what's going on with them so I saw how they seemed to just stay quietly in their house all day today, enjoying their new baby and getting much needed rest I would imagine. I was taken back to those first days and weeks of Corbin's life and wished I could take back all the stress and panic I felt about wanting to have the house clean, or wishing I could just feel good enough to get back to "normal" life. My older sister would tell me to just enjoy having only one baby because it would be the only time in my life when I could have only one tiny baby to consume my whole existence. It's not that I wish to go back to Corbin's newborn days because honestly, I have loved each new phase that he has entered so far. But seeing my SIL with her new tiny baby made me realize again how quickly time passes, how quickly babies grow up, and how unimportant it is to me now to know that my laundry and dishes were done those first weeks of Corbin's life. I only now realize what my sister meant that this was the only time I'd have one baby that I can devote all my time to, and I'm wishing I hadn't been in such a rush to figure out how to "get things done" while he slept, and just let myself hold his little snuggly body during those naps.
Tomorrow he'll be three months old. He started the year out rolling from his back to his stomach (although he hasn't done it since). At Christmas he weighed 16 pounds and he's already wearing some 6 and even 9 month clothes. I love how responsive he is now--he loves to smile back at people when they smile at him, and he squeals when I kiss his cheeks. I can't wait till he gives me a real laugh. He's totally fascinated with his hands now and loves to try to put his whole fist in his mouth, sometimes gagging himself in his efforts.
I never realized what a special gift having a child would be and I'm so grateful Heavenly Father let me be Corbin's mommy!
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