Happy 10 Months!

Wow! I can't believe it's already been ten months since Corbin joined our family! With all the changes going on in our lives (moving in and out of our house as we renovate, adjusting to balancing work and home, as well as all the normal parenting life changes), I feel like my journaling and blogging have fallen to the wayside. I am a little sad tonight to think of all the experiences, memories, milestones, and lessons learned that haven't been recorded and may be lost somewhere in my mind until maybe the Resurrection when I can have a perfect remembrance restored to me.

So I decided I better get some things in writing to celebrate Corbin's 10 month birthday tomorrow...

New Tricks

In the last month or two, Corbin has learned to clap. He loves to clap and he'll even yell a sort of "Yay" while he claps. Sometimes while he plays I'll turn on "So You Think You Can Dance" to entertain me while I keep him from pulling too many books off the shelves, or yanking appliances down onto him by their cords, etc. etc. Whenever he hears the studio audience applause, he stops what he's doing and claps and yells "yay" with them.

We started to teach him sign language. Whenever I say "more" and show him the sign, he responds by clapping. I decided that is close enough so I always give him more after he claps. The sign he actually seems to understand though is "please." I was so impressed with this. One night he was playing with a little bottle and Dustin took it from him, which made him start to fuss. Dustin said, "No, we don't throw tantrums to get what we want." I thought, He's a little young to be trying to reason with him, hon. But sure enough, Dustin showed him the "please" sign and then Corbin stopped fussing and did it back to him. I was amazed! We are still working on "Thank you".

Corbin continues to pull himself up on anything he can get his hands on, and he loves doing the finger walk. Fortunately for me, he's the perfect height to where I don't really have to bend over to help him walk that way. In just the last month, he started to push from a squat to a stand all by himself, so we figure it won't be long till he's walking. In the meantime, his crawl has gotten faster and faster. Today, he crawled upstream in the splash pad. He doesn't put his knees down anymore which I think helps him go faster. For a while, he had a tripod crawl with only the left knee down, but now he usually keeps both up and does sort of a bear crawl.

Best trick is of course the one that has been all-consuming for me the last week or so--SLEEPING! Definitely want to remember some of the things I've learned so I can hopefully have a smoother time with baby #2 (Not making any announcements with that).

Favorites

Corbin doesn't really have a lovey or a stuffed animal or anything he seems to cling to--something I tried to introduce for sleep training, but he seems to prefer to do things by himself. He was a binky baby for a while but even that has lost its luster over the last couple months. I don't mind because I figure it saves me the battle of weaning him from it when he's older. Although, I wonder if it will be useful when I start weaning him from nursing. We shall see...

He has always loved to have blankets or sheets or clothes, or any material really, flowing over his face. It's always been a way to make him laugh. But just this weekend, on our drive home from Salt Lake, he started to play peek-a-boo himself. He pulled the blanket up over his face and then pulled it down to smile at me, and I'd say "peek-a-boo" so he did it over and over.

Another game he started playing on the trip was a little echo game. He'd make a sound like a squeak or a moan or a squawk or a honk and when I would repeat it, he'd laugh and laugh. Dustin taught him months ago how to make the "ba ba ba" sound by hitting your mouth while you "ah"--he loves it so now he does it to calm himself down when he's bored or fussy in the car, and also he tries to do it to me when I hold him.

Here's a couple cute videos and photos I don't think I've shared yet...

Here's an old video of a funny discovery we made about Corbin's enthusiasm for sounds. He still loves to drum on any hard surface he can reach. We also turn on music in the mornings and he starts bouncing as soon as he hears any kind of rhythm.

First Red Vine. Dad had been waiting what he thought was FOREVER to let him try a Red Vine. I think I gave in at 6 months, and yes, Corbin loved it.

 Wagon ride at Grandma Bonnie's with cousin Eben.

 Love the toys at Grandma's house

 Strawberry yogurt is definitely a favorite food

Love Grandpa Tom and love the camera 

Eating big kid food with mom.

First camping trip with mom and dad. Loved the tent.

Looking back at some old photos and videos makes me realize how truly amazing children are. Every once in a while I look at Corbin and wonder at how each day he grows and learns and becomes this little person that was not in the world and now suddenly is and will be. My world is forever changed because of him, and who knows what else in the world might be different for his being in it. What an amazing gift Heavenly Father has given me to be Corbin's mommy. 

Love you baby boy! Happy 10 months!

Sleeping Update

Just had to record the great news. One day before Corbin's 10 month birthday he learned to go to sleep. I took him in for a nap this morning, he fussed a little when the lights went out because he knew what was coming. But as soon as I laid him in his bed, he rolled right onto his side and began his little soothing sounds. We're two for two this afternoon on not fighting sleep, and hoping the trend keeps up for bedtime tonight.

We just got back from Salt Lake and I was so worried that the trip would mess up his sleep training. My two sweet girlfriends watched him while I performed and had to put him down, which means he had to do a little crying it out. I could tell that had worried him a little when I tried to put him down last night. He wouldn't let me leave the room, but would try to sleep as long as my hand was on his back. He was even swinging his arm back occasionally to make sure my arm was still there with my hand. I knew he needed to feel safe since he'd slept somewhere new as well as having someone new put him to bed for the last three nights, so I wasn't bothered by it.

Anyway, this morning and this afternoon he didn't need me to stay in the room, or keep my hand on his back. He's doing great and I'm so proud of him!

Our Sleep Training Journey

Yes, I am writing on my blog again, a sign that Corbin is finally taking a nap that I don't need to take with him. This is amazing, of course, and yet, I have this funny sadness about it.

Corbin has been an all-night snacker for the last almost ten months. (I can't believe he is almost ten months!) I used to say, Corbin is a "bad sleeper" until I read a sleep training book which helped me see that most of his issues were results of things I had done. I beat myself up about that for a day or two until I realized that I did what worked for the time, and now it's not working anymore. This isn't a post about poor Jennie who didn't get any sleep, or what not to do, but just some thoughts I'm having as Corbin and I enter a new phase, one that hopefully gives Dustin and me some much-needed time together again. Not to mention will make me a happier, more patient wife and mother.

For those interested in sleep-training thoughts, I'll share this. I'm reading a book called "The Child Whisperer Solves All Your Problems." As I've studied sleep training methods, I've come to the conclusion that you should do whichever method you think you can be consistent in. In fact, one study of five different methods found that they all work equally well, provided that the parents are consistent. The gist of Child Whisperer's "pick-up/put-down" method is that you let your baby cry it out, but you stay right there with him. Each time he stands up, you lay him back down. And you keep laying him back down until he gives up and "self-soothes" to sleep.

Corbin's been pretty textbook so far. Laura Hogg (the author) says not to be surprised if it takes 100 put-downs, and Corbin took at least that. Dustin thinks it was two hours of crying, but he was just listening from the hallway. I was in there talking to Corbin and laying him down and came out and thought it had only been an hour.

But the results have amazed me. Already on day 2, when I turned off the lights for nap-time, Corbin started fussing a little. He knew what was coming, but he took his lay-down like a champ, rolled over and began to self-soothe.

This is what surprised me. Even though I was so excited that he wasn't going to fight me, I had this sad feeling that my baby felt defeated or abandoned. I'd never actually abandoned him, which is why I liked the method better than full Cry-it-out. But for some reason, I felt better laying him down over and over and hearing his cries of protest than hearing those sad little sounds of defeat.

I know he feels better--today was the first day he woke up happy since he was a little tiny baby. And I know I feel better--today was the first day I didn't need to nap myself when I put him down. I've had time to blog, fold laundry, check Facebook, and eat my own lunch hands-free :-) I feel like I'm establishing some control and order in my house again. And yet, I notice that I want to go cuddle him so badly.

So this is what I've discovered...I think I secretly like nursing my baby to sleep. I like holding my sleeping baby in my arms. I like snuggling him in my bed. It makes my sleep crappy. It strains my relationship with my husband. It even sometimes strains my relationship with my baby. I feel more like a giant binky than a guide and support that can capably care for his physical and emotional needs. And yet, as I strive to correct those issues, I notice this sadness that my baby is growing up. I think that's part of what makes those self-soothing noises he makes hard to hear.

So this is what "Baby Hungry" feels like...

Funny thing is, I was just telling my sisters-in-law that I don't think I'll ever feel baby hungry. People have told me before that once my baby isn't so baby I would feel it and I didn't believe them. Corbin seemed like more than I could handle sometimes. I couldn't imagine doing it all over again. Even though I knew deep down I would. I just wasn't sure I'd ever really WANT to do it again :-)

In this journey, I've come to a second conclusion. I read about sleep training options while I was pregnant and right after Corbin was born. But I had decided to feed on demand and see how it goes. I guess part of my homebirth mentality was carried through--let nature take its course, let the baby's natural rhythms determine his schedule, etc. I do think that Corbin established a schedule and we got some sort of routine established, but it was pretty casual and never something that I really involved Dustin in. So when I started teaching again a couple nights a week, and then we moved, and then he got sick, and then he was teething, and then we moved again, and then his room was too hot without AC, and then we moved again, and then we traveled...all this time I kept saying, when things get back to normal, we will sleep train.

And here we are, six months of Corbin's life have passed in this "not normal" state. And that's when it hit me, this is life. We were two days from being back in our own house, with AC. But we were still at Dustin's brothers where I didn't feel it was very thoughtful to start letting my baby cry for hours in the night. And I went to put him down for a nap and just started pick-up/put-down. I thought, we are starting today. And if it messes up his sleep when we get to our new house, we will do pick-up/put-down again. And if it messes up his sleep when we go to Salt Lake this weekend, we will do pick-up/put-down again. Because life is never just stay at home all day, all week, have the perfect temperature, have a tummy that feels great, have no teeth coming in, etc. etc. And when Corbin is a grown-up, he needs to be able to go to sleep in less than ideal conditions.

So once I realized sleep is a life skill, I felt ready to teach it to Corbin. And once I started pick-up/put-down, I knew I had to see it through. It's actually been a good method for me. I've been pleased with the quick results and I feel like it's something I have the stamina and patience for. Funny how I can feel patient for hours doing our dance of pick-up/put-down, but I was losing it to nurse him back to sleep for five minutes every two hours. It all has to do with feeling in control, and feeling like I am teaching him, rather than perpetuating a bad habit which I didn't see an end to in the near future.

That's probably way more thoughts than I ever thought I'd have about sleep training. To summarize, my advice to new moms. Choose something that you think you can stick to--even when you are dead tired, even when you are traveling, even when you are moving, and so on and so forth.

Here's a little video I just found in my archives. I used to think the self-soothing sounds were cute enough to film, apparently :-)